Crochet swimsuits are not practical for the beach.

No. Cute for Instagram, awful for actual swimming. The holes stretch out when wet, you’ll be flashing everyone, and sand gets stuck in every stitch. Sitting on a towel? That crochet pattern will leave an imprint on your skin for an hour.

You can’t really swim in them — the yarn soaks up water and sags, and if it’s cotton, it’ll take all day to dry. Most aren’t lined either, so modesty goes out the window as soon as you hit the water.

They work for lounging poolside if you’re careful, but a beach day means sand, salt, and movement. That’s a recipe for a wardrobe malfunction.

Better to save the crochet for a cover-up or a dry brunch.